A good friend tells me to have a little faith.
But God, it gets so much harder everyday.

But still, it's supposed to be mommy's son week. I haven't seen mum in 2 weeks and I'm missing her truckloads; so much that it's eating my insides.

Here goes my neglection:

I don't care who she is to you, she has no business in my affairs. I'm only here as a last resort because mum couldn't afford to take me with her. So stop nagging at me on your woman-whore's behalf. Our situation is your mistake, don't make it sound like I'm your greatest frustration. And you know how I hate to be forced to school after a hallucination-Monday.

Intoxication, like insanity, infancy and duress, is a legal excuse, a defense where the defendant is not blameworthy for being engaged in a conduct that would have otherwise been a crime. I guess this is my reasoning for how I got into it. Somehow you may argue that it's not relevant. It is. It's just the influence of what substance I was under that varied in different stages. You-induced stupor. Realisation that you cannot be around when I'm down and out is a great catalyst to quit. I'm sober now.

P.s. I didn't know that I have two self-s when I'm hallucinating. One is the one lying on the bed with a sceptre and a crown wearing Italy boxers and another one wearing Fox tee, Fox shawl and Fox Jeans all ready for Brilliante 2. Believe it or not, I learnt the art of hallucination. I love myself, as a personal demon.

Labels: Personal demons get stronger everyday.